What is normal? 
I'm not really sure, but I do know that this is not how I feel.    I had one fellow tell me that normal was a setting on a washing machine.  Everybody's normal is different.  When you have PTSD one thing is for certain, it will take a lot of time, effort, and meds to get us back to where we were before the attack.  Mr. Attempted Rapist was a world killer and he took away my innocence, my joy, and my zest for life.  It will make it difficult for me to ever trust being a lone with a man again.  I will never experience the warmth of a touch again without thinking of what happened long ago.  Just ask my kids if I like to be touched by strangers.

I am very fortunate that I work with the Veteran's Administration because those Ph.D.’s really know what they are talking about and how to handle awkward situations when I have a panic attack.  Many outside therapists and counselors really have no idea how to handle PTSD moods and flight or fight responses, they use the same old methods that seem to work on most people but they never take into consideration of the peril they put us in.   You certainly just can't put someone in a box and provoke them and not expect to get a reaction of fight or flight.  I know that when I was triggered last week into a very severe panic attack that required hospitalization, I was put into a similar situation right before because I was put in a box and then provoked (and that can mean many things).  This time it again leads to flight.  Please let us go when we need to go without threatening us, we are only using the coping skills that we have been taught by many pointy headed people who know PTSD.

Please be patient with us MST/PTSD surviving folks, we will have set backs, but we don't want you to give up on us.  Please be positive because we are scared of what is happening to our bodies and minds and sometimes we don't understand why this happening.  Trust me when I say this, nobody wants to feel like we do, so please cut us some slack when you can.